There are certain stories that will always make me smile at first and then cringe at the end; this is one of those stories.
Back in college I had the worst fake ID, and so did the rest of my girlfriends, so whenever we discovered a bar that we could get into we would run with it, and that's where Porky's comes into the picture. Porky's was the ultimate place for us when we were underage, because it was only 18 to get in and then at the bar they wouldn't card us again AND if we got there before 11, their fishbowl drinks were only $15. We would each get a fishbowl and go to town. The place was a dive, it was gross and dirty, but it was always fun.
Except for one time....It started as a usual night at Porky's, but better because a lot of people were home from school for Thanksgiving break, so it was a big get together on the Tuesday before Turkey day. We all gathered our fishbowls and began drinking as normal. At one point some other person left a fishbowl on our table so we decided it would be a good idea to drink that as well...and the night progressed. Usually we take a cab home from the city, but this night we decided it'd be a fine idea to take the lovely A train home since we were with A's cousin and another friend. Somehow we made it back to Queens. I was staying at A's house because we had intentions to go to our high school's thanksgiving mass.
Well the next morning when our other friends tried to call us to join them to go to the mass, which would have been lovely if either of us could move. After they came back from the mass we decided to go to the diner for breakfast. As soon as my food arrived, I had to run to the bathroom, to throw up of course. And then the phone call to end all phone calls occurred.
A's mom calls her to ask her if she felt her smacking the shit out of her this morning, naturally A is clueless, we were passed out. She proceeds to explain how when she came downstairs to leave for work, she saw A but not me, and she saw the bathroom light on so she walked on in to find, yours truly, passed out on the bowl...passed out post-urination, so yes, pants around the ankles, sitting on the toilet, just sleeping away. Poor thing had to grab me and pick my pants up and drag me back to the couch and then thats when she smacked her daughter across the face. Neither of these events do we remember. So we start to think that maybe there was a little something more in our drinks.
Later we find out another story which leads us to believe we were group date-raped. A's cousin went back to his house after walking us home and passed out on his couch and woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, apparently he must have been making a lot of noise because his mom went to see what was happening, and what was happening was that he was trying to pee behind the couch.
That was one of the last times we went to Porky's, not because we are certain there was crack in those fishbowls, but because it became too popular and too crowded, and therefore we wanted nothing to do with it anymore. Every now and then that story comes up and iIstart to laugh hysterically at the beginning and then when I think about the end, I feel slightly embarassed, but I laugh even harder.
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